2012 started as a year of mixed feelings and ended that way as well... but in 2 very different senses. This was the year I arrived in my late 20's. Had awful heart break but also had wonderful, sweet romance. Been out on my own. Repaired important relationships. It was a year of excruciating rejection but beautiful love.
My marriage broke down in 2011. My relationships were strained with friends and family. I was vilified by them, despite having done nothing but get myself out of an unhealthy relationship. But being the one to make a tough decision can turn people against you. Reluctantly, during the month of December 2011, I got into a new relationship. I was very unsure as I felt it was too soon, but he said he did not want a casual relationship. I said yes and predictably, like many rebound relationships, I fell hard for him.
Admittedly I pushed him away a bit as I was in a lot of emotional turmoil, but I decided I wanted to try to make it work. I spent New Years with him. New Years was a blast. One of my best. I was happy.
Then in Spring 2012, while I was on holiday in Thailand (over 6000 miles from home) he messaged me on facebook saying he didn't love me anymore and wanted to break up. It tore me apart. I had been suffering from the worst depression I'd ever had for the whole of the start of 2012, and this really didn't help. My ex told me one of the reasons he broke from me was because I never seemed happy.
A few weeks later I was looking through an online dating site. I didn't feel ready to give my heart again, but there was no harm in window shopping. I checked out one profile of someone who was cute, but I didn't message him because I wasn't really looking much. Then I saw he checked me out, so I thought I'd throw him a message. After a whole night of messaging we decided it'd be nice to meet.
to be continued...
Tuesday, 1 January 2013
Saturday, 8 December 2012
Just a small note
As a person who suffers from mental illness and suicidal thoughts, I really can't help taking it personal when someone calls a person stupid and judges them for committing suicide. They DIED FROM THEIR ILLNESS! You don't judge someone for dying from cancer. Don't be a dick, respect death regardless of cause.
Thursday, 29 November 2012
Selling some of my crap :)
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| Hamutaro Bento Box |
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| Super Long Bunny Ear Hat |
Wednesday, 14 November 2012
Moomin mug prize!
I won runner up in a Moomin colouring competition! It's worth about £15. I shall be super careful with it. Love it so much!!
Friday, 26 October 2012
Monday, 8 October 2012
Trolls are essential to the health of the internet
Having been a regular internet user for over 12 years, I consider myself pretty knowledgeable about the world wide web.
I have been on both sides of the trolling coin. Never to an extreme degree, but I have gave and received some light trolling in my time on the internet. I consider myself a student of internet culture. I have spent hours trawling around Encyclopedia Dramatica and rather enjoy reading about the elaborate trolling schemes towards the many LOLcows of the internet. It's one of my main sources of entertainment.
Now I am not saying that trolls should be kept around purely for my amusement. I think they have a legitimate use in cyber culture. They are the teachers of the internet (kind of). Let me explain:
Lets say you are a fresh faced 14 year old (much like I was when I first got internet in my home) let loose on the intertubes. Maybe you join Tumblr, DeviantArt, Gaiaonline, or any number of online communities popular with the youth of the internet today. You are young, precocious, and naive to the dangers online. You fill out a profile on any or all of these social websites. In hopes to seem open to making new friends you share your name, phone number, email address, postal address, etc. You talk about your belief that deep down you are a fox/dragon hybrid. You post your MSpaint artwork of your "fursona". You find like-minded individuals. "Thank goodness!" you say "I thought I was the only one *tear rolls down cheek*".
What a beautiful scenario. A young and insecure teen finds his/her place in this world, finally. A place where they can do no wrong. People embrace them with no prejudice. They are not judged on their spotty, gangly looks. There's no adults telling them what to do. This world of the internet is what they have been looking for all this time!
But is that really such a good thing? A world with no consequences? I'm not talking about legal consequences, but social consequences. As social creatures, we need to learn how to act/not act around other human beings. The internet is a whole new social world, with different rules that we all need to learn. But how do we learn? Trolls!
Lets go back to our 14 year old fox/dragon other-kin. They posted all over their chosen social network about their most personal thoughts and information. A wild troll appears! With minimal snooping he finds this child's vital statistics. Address, phone number, D.O.B., etc. A lot of things that are very unsavoury can be done with this information. Identity theft, a paedophile could easily find you, stalkers... just to name a few.
But what does the gentle troll do? Says a few nasty things that make you think twice about over-sharing every thought in your head. Maybe he'll make a few prank calls, send you a few pizzas, sign you up to "big cocks weekly" magazine. This will be very annoying and rather embarrassing, but at the end of the day what is the only real consequence of all this? You're parents ban you from the internet for a while and you learn an important lesson about posting personal information online. Trolls make better & safer netizens; and hey, if someone cannot learn from their mistakes, that's not the fault of the trolls and why not exploit the situation and have some fun while they're at it?
I have been on both sides of the trolling coin. Never to an extreme degree, but I have gave and received some light trolling in my time on the internet. I consider myself a student of internet culture. I have spent hours trawling around Encyclopedia Dramatica and rather enjoy reading about the elaborate trolling schemes towards the many LOLcows of the internet. It's one of my main sources of entertainment.
Now I am not saying that trolls should be kept around purely for my amusement. I think they have a legitimate use in cyber culture. They are the teachers of the internet (kind of). Let me explain:
Lets say you are a fresh faced 14 year old (much like I was when I first got internet in my home) let loose on the intertubes. Maybe you join Tumblr, DeviantArt, Gaiaonline, or any number of online communities popular with the youth of the internet today. You are young, precocious, and naive to the dangers online. You fill out a profile on any or all of these social websites. In hopes to seem open to making new friends you share your name, phone number, email address, postal address, etc. You talk about your belief that deep down you are a fox/dragon hybrid. You post your MSpaint artwork of your "fursona". You find like-minded individuals. "Thank goodness!" you say "I thought I was the only one *tear rolls down cheek*".
What a beautiful scenario. A young and insecure teen finds his/her place in this world, finally. A place where they can do no wrong. People embrace them with no prejudice. They are not judged on their spotty, gangly looks. There's no adults telling them what to do. This world of the internet is what they have been looking for all this time!
But is that really such a good thing? A world with no consequences? I'm not talking about legal consequences, but social consequences. As social creatures, we need to learn how to act/not act around other human beings. The internet is a whole new social world, with different rules that we all need to learn. But how do we learn? Trolls!
Lets go back to our 14 year old fox/dragon other-kin. They posted all over their chosen social network about their most personal thoughts and information. A wild troll appears! With minimal snooping he finds this child's vital statistics. Address, phone number, D.O.B., etc. A lot of things that are very unsavoury can be done with this information. Identity theft, a paedophile could easily find you, stalkers... just to name a few.
But what does the gentle troll do? Says a few nasty things that make you think twice about over-sharing every thought in your head. Maybe he'll make a few prank calls, send you a few pizzas, sign you up to "big cocks weekly" magazine. This will be very annoying and rather embarrassing, but at the end of the day what is the only real consequence of all this? You're parents ban you from the internet for a while and you learn an important lesson about posting personal information online. Trolls make better & safer netizens; and hey, if someone cannot learn from their mistakes, that's not the fault of the trolls and why not exploit the situation and have some fun while they're at it?
Saturday, 22 September 2012
New Phone & pub quiz goodness
Finally joining the ranks of the Smart Phone people. I already feel 10% smugger.
On a side note, I came in first place at a Simpsons pub quiz! :) Won a 24 pack of Stella!
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| My baby |
On a side note, I came in first place at a Simpsons pub quiz! :) Won a 24 pack of Stella!
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| The spoils of war |
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